UK Wedding News
12/08/2014
A fifth of married couples in Britain hold a secret that could end their marriage, a new study has revealed.
While the research, conducted by Slater & Gordon Lawyers, found that almost all couple claim to have at least one secret, many admitted to a 'Sword of Damocles' hanging over them. In fact, some 25% admitted they have lied to their partner over something important.
A total of 2,175 married Britons took part in the study and the secrets they keep hidden from their spouse vary from infidelity, keeping pornography or breaking the law, to money troubles or drug use.
On average, the average married couple is said to keep six secrets between them, and while the average secret has been kept for nearly 10 years, a quarter of respondents said they had been hiding the truth about something from their husband or wife for more than 25 years.
Many admitted to having suffered from sleepless nights, mood swings or feelings of constant guilt because of their deceitfulness, however 42% still believe that they will not get caught out. For 26% though, they are under no illusions that if their secret ever was to come out, it would end their marriage. A sixth said the secret was already impacting on their marriage as they could never fully relax, while more than 12% said they had resorted to 'extreme lengths' to hide their secret – from cutting off friends who knew the truth, to changing jobs.
When asked as to why they had chosen not to tell their other half though, most said it was because they didn't want to worry them, while others claimed they wouldn't understand or the incident was a 'one-off'. A further 28% said they had kept a secret for so long, that it would seem worse than it actually was if they were to now share it with their partner.
Commenting on the findings, Slater & Gordon Family Lawyer, Amanda McAlister, said: "There is often a perception that marriages come to an end because of lots of little things coming to a head over time, but as Divorce Lawyers we find that a high proportion of clients come to us having been in a happy marriage just weeks earlier. It's normally the case that one lie or one secret is the undoing of the whole marriage.
"These divorce proceedings are often the most bitter and aggressive as well as there are a lot more emotions running high. They can also quite acrimonious in terms of negotiating over assets and can drag on for years."
She continued: "Couples who drift apart over time tend to be happier trying Mediation or have a 'quickie' divorce but marriages that come to an explosive end can be expensive. Our advice to people in these circumstances is to find a reasonably priced Divorce Lawyer who will be honest with you and that you get on with. That way they will work with you to make the process as easy as possible.
"Because, if you are hiding secrets then there is a strong chance they will be revealed during the financial disclosure part of the divorce proceedings. We often find couples have hidden bank accounts, secret properties or even personal credit cards they have used to hide purchases during a marriage. These things will come out during the divorce process and they are likely to make the process messier."
(JP/IT)
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Secrets Could Destroy 1 In 5 Marriages
A fifth of married couples in Britain hold a secret that could end their marriage, a new study has revealed.
While the research, conducted by Slater & Gordon Lawyers, found that almost all couple claim to have at least one secret, many admitted to a 'Sword of Damocles' hanging over them. In fact, some 25% admitted they have lied to their partner over something important.
A total of 2,175 married Britons took part in the study and the secrets they keep hidden from their spouse vary from infidelity, keeping pornography or breaking the law, to money troubles or drug use.
On average, the average married couple is said to keep six secrets between them, and while the average secret has been kept for nearly 10 years, a quarter of respondents said they had been hiding the truth about something from their husband or wife for more than 25 years.
Many admitted to having suffered from sleepless nights, mood swings or feelings of constant guilt because of their deceitfulness, however 42% still believe that they will not get caught out. For 26% though, they are under no illusions that if their secret ever was to come out, it would end their marriage. A sixth said the secret was already impacting on their marriage as they could never fully relax, while more than 12% said they had resorted to 'extreme lengths' to hide their secret – from cutting off friends who knew the truth, to changing jobs.
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When asked as to why they had chosen not to tell their other half though, most said it was because they didn't want to worry them, while others claimed they wouldn't understand or the incident was a 'one-off'. A further 28% said they had kept a secret for so long, that it would seem worse than it actually was if they were to now share it with their partner.
Commenting on the findings, Slater & Gordon Family Lawyer, Amanda McAlister, said: "There is often a perception that marriages come to an end because of lots of little things coming to a head over time, but as Divorce Lawyers we find that a high proportion of clients come to us having been in a happy marriage just weeks earlier. It's normally the case that one lie or one secret is the undoing of the whole marriage.
"These divorce proceedings are often the most bitter and aggressive as well as there are a lot more emotions running high. They can also quite acrimonious in terms of negotiating over assets and can drag on for years."
She continued: "Couples who drift apart over time tend to be happier trying Mediation or have a 'quickie' divorce but marriages that come to an explosive end can be expensive. Our advice to people in these circumstances is to find a reasonably priced Divorce Lawyer who will be honest with you and that you get on with. That way they will work with you to make the process as easy as possible.
"Because, if you are hiding secrets then there is a strong chance they will be revealed during the financial disclosure part of the divorce proceedings. We often find couples have hidden bank accounts, secret properties or even personal credit cards they have used to hide purchases during a marriage. These things will come out during the divorce process and they are likely to make the process messier."
(JP/IT)
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